Tuesday, 31 March 2009

Female Sexuality and Tantra

Following a healing session yesterday with a beautiful 63 year old woman, I feel I need to write down some some of my thoughts........

Many women complain that sexual prowess is the sole terrain of men, and there is really nothing a woman can do about it. This is a holdover from a tired old patriarchal domination of our sexual practices and mores where every act of sex seems hopelessly weighed in favor of the male climax. This mindset unfortunately still dominates most heterosexual relationships.

I feel strongly that particularly middle-aged and older women have been unjustly made to feel they should abdicate their power as sexual beings. Originating from Christian attitudes - today this propaganda is generated largely by the advertising and media world. Nothing could be further from the truth. A Tantric therapist is committed to showing mature women methods of opening themselves up to the life-affirming Tantric way which offers possibilities for them, to experience the most fulfilling sexual intimacy they've ever had at any age!

Monday, 23 March 2009

Tantric massage

Tantric massage is basically the meeting of two people offering unconditional love to explore intimacy and trust, through touch, in the presence of the Divine. It also understood that in the context of tantra, sexuality and spirituality are inseparable.

In my opinion the reason why Tantra survives today, despite the persecution of sexuality in various religions and civilizations, the reason it emerges spontaneously in different periods and places in history - is based on something indefinable that allows the participants to experience what seems to be for all intents and purposes - the presence of the God/Goddess in one’s partner.

For some, sexuality leads to sainthood; for others it is the road to hell... In my view sexuality is not a leisure or part-time activity. It is a way of being - integral part of human spirituality.

The story of Christianity's development has been painfully marked by a growing chasm, separating body from soul. This story is one of the most significant and fateful developments in the history of the West. A RADICAL renewal of the re-union between Sexuality and Spirituality is absolutely essential for our human health and psyche. This shift could help people to accept tantric massage as a therapy instead of seeing it as prostitution.

Among the monotheistic religions, patriarchal cultures of the ancient world, the Hebrew is unique in their positive valuation of sexuality, erotic love. Hebrew tradition, like tantra, has also consistently celebrated human sexual intimacy and its pleasures. In this tradition, sexual asceticism, celibacy has no religious value. Sexual intercourse in marriage is a religious duty and blessing, a meritorious act. The Talmud describes a debate over whether to include the Song of Songs in the Hebrew Bible. Rabbi Akiba declared it to be the holiest and most sacred part of Scriptures, despite an indication that the lovers are unmarried.

Monday, 16 March 2009

Healing in Tantric Massage

One of the most important thing we can do as therapists and healers is to bear witness: to hold a non-judgmental but discerning space for the person. We need to be able to discern what would help them (a touch, an action, a holding, a medicine, a kind word, an observation, humour, etc ), but we cannot be judgmental, for judgment limits and constrains where healing needs room for natural expansion. Bearing witness means being able to see things as they are, not as we wish they would be, or we think they should be, and to "hold space" compassionately for whatever arises. Much of the work of a healer lies in being present to another, not frightened by their emotions, not closed down, not colluding, not withholding - just being present.

The empathic witnessing by a therapist is in itself a reparative, healing, relationship. In therapeutic bodywork and tantric massage a male therapist can provide the quality of touch and presence that can restore health in mind, body and soul. The quality of this presence will also create safety and in this safe space healing can happen.